Entries from November 2009 ↓

Today, Master S instituted a “perfect room” day. That means that whatever room He picks needs to be cleaned in a perfect manner by the time He gets home from work. As my behind still bears witness to the hairbrush from last night, i wasn’t eager to do a less-than-spectacular job on the cleaning.

Today He chose the living room/dining room as the perfect room. <sigh> There’s heavy furniture to move in this space, but i knew there’d better not be lack of effort on my part.

So i handled my business calls in the morning, then set out to complete the task at hand. Walls were scrubbed, light fixtures cleaned, chairs moved, a heavy wooden chest was dragged away from its usual resting spot, the dining room table was hauled off the heavy oriental rug as well (the rug was taken outside and shaken out). Of course, vacuuming and dusting were included. I was a bit concerned when 4:00 arrived.

i still had to make a picture-perfect dinner, get showered and groom myself to be presentable for Master when He walked in the door. As it was, i wasn’t able to work out due to the duties of the day. i would’ve liked to have done so, but will have to face James, my trainer, tomorrow.

Anyway, i fretted most of the day as to where Master might find a stray speck of dust. Nothing escaped my efforts as far as i could tell. The threat of punishment is a motivator for me, though i’d be positively motivated just by Master requesting the task to be done to perfection. A nod of His head and a word of appreciation is always appreciated.

Master walked in the door and i was in the proper greeting position – kneeling, forehead on the floor, arms in front and wrists crossed, fingers straight in a pleasing manner. My knees were spread far enough apart to allow my feet to touch each other at the big toes, arches nicely displayed.

i thought Master would start His inspection immediately upon arrival, but He allowed me to get up and asked if i thought i’d done a good job. Meanwhile, the roast and potatoes were filling the house with a mouth-watering aroma. i told him that i’d worked hard to get it as near perfection as i could. He asked if there were any areas He should inspect…i couldn’t think of any that didn’t get my attention.

He surprised me by saying then that was good enough for Him. i was filled with a sense of relief, not wishing to replay similar sensations as i experienced last night. It took a few minutes for me to relax but we soon settled into just being with each other.

Master S really doesn’t have to worry about my stepping out of line on purpose just to get punished. In fact, it’s a motivator for me to remain on task just so i won’t have to undergo the experience more than necessary. Perhaps that makes His job easier but I know that He wouldn’t mind it if i liked a bit of pain every now and then.

There’s a distinction to be made between a “natural” sub and one that gets off only on the sexual side of it. Many discussions with Master S have led to the conclusion that people who view the sub role as sexual fantasy will not be able to sustain a 24/7 lifestyle. For them the occasional scene is more to their liking. Then they can dust themselves off and go about their lives as they so choose afterwards.

At times, in an attempt to live their fantasies 24/7, some force themselves to take on a continuous sub role that’s not a natural fit, such as Master S did. It serves to create resentment if done with the pretense of making it into a lifestyle. This is a BIG point to take to heart. 

You see, Master S has had sub fantasies (more in the past than the present time). When he would carry out an order while in the sub role, he’d chafe at doing so. He didn’t find joy in carrying out the task, but rather viewed it as something to be endured.  It was always easier for him when he was sexually stimulated, but sexual energy can’t be sustained every minute of every day. After a while, resentment would grow and I can just imagine how irritated he’d get. Not to mention the things he’d try to do in order to be caught and punished for that sexual turn-on.

When we were initially talking about his being my sub, i realized it would feel like work for both of us. i’d constantly need to check up on him just to make sure he wasn’t committing any felonies. i’d end up being his jailer without much time for relaxation or enjoyment of “us”.

This situation doesn’t bode well for a relationship where the participants are thinking long-term. How long can someone internalize their resentment and potential anger before it seeps out the cracks? Not remaining true to your innate nature is bound to create division within yourself, and then it flows outward from there, affecting all those involved. Though it may look good on paper (or in your dreams), it doesn’t work in an ongoing committed relationship…or at least a happy one.

Whereas, someone who’s naturally submissive seeks to serve. By no means should this be interpreted as saying a sub is a doormat. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. The Tao admonishes, “Be like water”. Our strength is in yielding…a sustaining, consistent force for those we serve. A Dom’s strength is their ability to exert mindful direction, yet it’s up to the sub whether or not to obey. With that awareness, we need each other. The universal yin and yang.

i consider my service to Master as a joy. Knowing this one simple fact tells me that yes, i am a “natural”submissive.

So here it is, a normal Sunday afternoon, and then it happens, a severe infraction of the rules by slave desiree.  It was during a relatively normal situation for us.  Desiree was in the bathroom, just stepping out of the shower.  I happened to walk in as she was drying, and, in a passionate moment, we started to kiss.  After a couple minutes of this, I ordered her to go to the bed so that we could elevate the amore.  She eagerly complied. 

Laying on her back, hips on the edge so that I can have easy access to her genitalia, I start gently licking her pussy.  This is an activity in which I take great pleasure and can do literally for hours.  I love the smell, taste, wetness, and, most importantly, her response to my efforts.  I know I may be the Dom, but I love performing this “submissive” sex act for desiree.

Anyway, she is responding to my efforts in a positive manner, moving her hips up and down so that she can “masturbate” on my tongue, which is resting on the opening of her urethra (the spot she likes the most).  In my excitement, I move my lips up to her clit, and start to suck on it…and the clit ring at the same time.  Apparently this action caused much pain, because it caused her to perform a “felony”; she told me to “stop”.

There are only two felony infractions in my book for my slave: 1) not being naked in my presence, and 2) not immediately complying with an order, or asking me to stop during some activity.  Since these are serious mistakes, I take the correction just as seriously.  So where’s the problem?  I should just render the punishment and move on, just like it states in most every document or book that you read on “how to be a Dom”.   The problem is the fact that I do love her, and she loves me, and it is difficult to determine the appropriate sentence while her tears are dropping on my face.  I know she does not like pain.  I am sure that she would do most anything to avoid a punishment, and really does go out of her way to please me.  She did not make the mistake willingly, as the dreaded word “stop” just slipped, almost unconsciously, out of her mouth.  She was definitely upset that such a pleasurable, tender, loving moment turned suddenly into a felonious predicament.  It wasn’t like she absolutely refused to carry out a direct command, or pranced around me with her clothes on.  No, this was just an innocent slip of the tongue.

However, if I let this infraction slide by, what good is my word?  I told her long ago that if she ever told me to stop, that it would have serious consequences.  She even agreed that this should be a punishable offence.  But the tears keep flowing. And the look on her face is one of extreme sadness, not fear of an impending torment, but sadness.  I must have missed the chapter in the “How To Be a Dom” book explaining how to punish a person you love, someone you value as more than just a BDSM play partner.  Damn, this 24/7 Dom/sub stuff is truly hard to live if you love each other, and the sub is not into pain, but the Dom is (at least to a certain degree).

My desiree knows that a felony punishment is meant to be harsh, and definitely more painful than anything we have done up to this point.  This should be so intense that she will never think of doing this misdeed ever again, regardless of the circumstances.  My goal, after all, is to have a perfectly trained slave that performs all tasks to a standard of excellence, not one that I have to punish frequently to get the desired results.  And definitely not one that would willingly break one of the two cardinal sins that I have carefully spelled out for her.

So after careful thought, I decided on a punishment that is meant for a much less harsh crime:  ten hard spanks with a hairbrush.  I thought about adding in a full day of drinking my urine as well, since I know she does not particularly like that activity, but then I passed on that idea.  I did, however, let her know that another breach of this agreement would result is a severe punishment suitable for a felonious act.  I actually felt good about my decision, because I know deep down that desiree is doing her best to make my life great, and that I would receive no pleasure in carrying out a harsh sentence. 

In this case, compassion was a greater thrill than the sadistic joy of delivering torment.  After announcing my sentence, desiree smiled in approval, knowing that I was giving her a mindful, and just, punishment.

We ended this session with three orgasms for her, one very good for myself, and the satisfaction that we worked through yet another problem faced by a loving couple that is trying to make this alternative lifestyle work.

The lights of Omaha have long been out of view as we are heading south down I29 toward Missouri.  Yes, it is our roadtrip to visit the family for Thanksgiving.  It’s dark outside, and the traffic has subsided as we speed on our way toward St. Joseph, MO, where we will be spending the night at the local Holidy Inn. 

 This trip is a little different than previous ones because we are using a rental Toyota Matrix, a vehicle definitely designed with economy in mind,  instead of my roomy Ford F150 (the mechanic broke off 4 spark plugs during a tune up, so it’s still in the shop). Trying to make a positive out of a negative, I at least know that desiree will be much closer to me while performing some of our travel rituals. 

Somewhere between Omaha and the Missouri border, I order desiree to remove her pants and shoes.  As stated in an earlier blog, I many times will have her naked, or nearly naked, in the car.  Well, now is the perfect time for her to begin undressing.  Once she has removed the specified clothing, she adjusts her position in the seat to comply with my demands while sitting in the car without clothes.  Essentially, her back is resting against the passenger side door with her legs spread wide.  One bare foot is resting on the front of the seat, turned in such a way that I can view the arch of her foot (I have a foot fetish, so I attempt to have her feet in the most visible position possible at all times).  Her other foot , at this moment is on my lap.

It’s dark in the car, so I cannot see her beautiful body very well, but my fingers can definitely manipulate her pussy.  I alternate between placing my fingers inside her opening and gently rubbing inside her sensitive pussy,next to the G spot, and then removing the fingers so that I can stroke her hairy labia.  I love to feel her moistening cunt and pussy, so  my hand explores this area for many miles.

desiree loves to have her feet rubbed, and since I have a foot fetish, I enjoy indulging  her with this treat on occasion.  Leaving her pussy, my right hand now begins to massage her left foot.  Soft moans can be heard from the passenger’s seat as I use varying pressure on the sole.  She is now warmed up to be finger fucked.

It hasn’t been mentioned yet in any blog posts, but desiree is VERY orgasmic.  To give any readers a general idea as to how orgasmic she truly is, on a 5 day summer trip to Door County, WI, she had well over 300 orgasms (I stopped counting at that point).   It is not uncommon for her to have up to 10 in a relatively short love making session, so give us 5 days, a lot of interstate driving time, and plenty of alone time in a motel, and 300 is not hard to achieve.

Anyway, now that she is primed, desiree takes my right hand and places it on her pussy, which is her  signal meaning “fuck me Master”. 

Happy to oblige, I start by inserting one finger while she readjusts herself in the seat so that I can more easily thrust my finger as deeply as possible in her cunt.  One finger can just barely hit the target I am groping for (her cervix), but she is now so hot that the first orgasm is already on the way.  I now add a second finger so I can now probe deeper into the vagina. 

From experience I know that there is a spot on her cervix that, if stimulated with the appropriate pressure, will produce an orgasm almost everytime.  Two fingers allows me to massage this spot easily.  By now, she has adjusted her hips so that her opening is pointing more toward the car ceiling, allowing me easy access to her pleasure center.  Eight or so orgasms later, I remove my fingers and let her gain her composure.

Later on, after refueling at some distant off ramp, I now have her remove all of her clothing.  It’s safe for her to have this kind of exposure due to the relatively light traffic and the fact that the car is dark inside.  If I feel that there is a chance for othes to see, I have her cover her top so that no one  is offended.  Her nudity, at least in the car, is for my pleasure only.  In my truck, we can get away with removing her pants even during daylight hours, because we are generally much higher than other vehicles, so I exploit this fact to allow myself the pleasure of finger fucking her even during short daytime trips around town.  This is a little more risky for sure, but we are very discreet.

She remains naked until we arrive in St. Joseph.  We check into the Holiday Inn, and once we step into the room, desiree immediately removes all of her clothes.  Unfortunately for her, she forgot to pack my razor,which she admitted to me earlier at dinner, so she will now receive her punishment for being unfocused.  I gave her the option of whipping her pussy with my belt, or having her butt spanked with my hairbrush, a sensation I know she does not like.  Predictably, she opts for the belt. 

Laying on the bed, legs up in the air, hands on her ankles, she awaits her punishment. I double up the belt, and, with medium intensity, whip her clit….and clit ring.  Apparently, the clit ring adds much in terms of stimulation , because she immediately doubled up in pain, and tears came swiftly to her eyes.  I gave her time to recover, and offered her the option to receive the hairbrush instead, which she  accepted.

Immediately, I instruct her to get into the greeting position (forehead and tits on the floor, kneeling on her wide spread knees, arms  crossed in front of her head, large toes touching).  This position gives me such a beautiful view of her lovely shaped ass and her pussy, but it also affords me unfettered access to these regions as well for punishments.  I have decided on ten smacks with the hairbrush, each hit alternately striking opposite cheeks.  She yelps with each blow, but I am undeterred.  Finally her ordeal is finished, and we then soak into our jacuzzi, turn on the air conditioner, slip into bed, and quickly drift off to sleep.

i’m signing over my possessions to Master to complete His ownership of me. This has given rise to much thought of the concept of ownership, as in my attachment to “things”. In our last moments of life, do we really value the “things” we have? Not that i know of!

As with most people, i’ve come to identify with some of my possessions. Handing them over – though painful – is a great spiritual practice. While this doesn’t automatically free my ego from finding other things to identify with, it’s a start. Certainly, i don’t purport myself to be “holier than thou” merely by renouncing my material possessions. That in itself would be feeding the ego in an unhealthy manner.

When one thinks about it, having ownership is an abstract concept. “I have, therefore I am. The more I have, the more I am.” It all comes down to our preoccupation with how we’re seen by others. We use how others view us as a mirror to our own value. It’s a collective delusion and certainly embedded within us from an early age.

My goal is to recognize when i’m seeking self-identity in things or even labels (such as “slave”).  Becoming upset or anxious means that i have attachment to those things or situations.

Eckhart Tolle says, “When we think ‘I don’t have enough yet’, what we’re really saying is ‘I am not enough yet”. The ego is seeking validity and a sense of permanence to make itself special. Our egos want us to think that “having” is a way to fulfillment. Don’t get me wrong, having ego is the catalyst to people doing purposeful things with their lives…but noticing when it gets in the way is a mindful practice.

i’m choosing to view the transition of signing over my material possessions to Master as a path to inner growth. It’s walking without the illusion of a safety net…a clear realization that all things change or dissolve over time. As uncomfortable as it is, my dependence on Master will increase by this single act. It’s letting go of the balance pole with which one walks the tightrope. i have to trust not only in Master, but in the spirit that guides me.

Satisfaction needs to come from a source within. As the saying goes, we are spirits having a human experience, not humans having a spiritual experience.

Though Master has a sadistic side, I met someone today who made me want to run to the safety of Master’s strong arms. This young man named James was smiling, but had a glint which hinted of future tortures. Master had graciously agreed to my request to procure James’ training services. After 5 minutes though, I was regretting my decision to hand over money for the experience.

First, James got me moving so he could evaluate my performance. After a while, he put me through some rigorous movements which left me gasping for air. He briskly informed me I’d be given breaks of 15 seconds only. During that time, I was to regain composure or perhaps gulp down some water. The predetermined time of 30 minutes had seemed minimal at first, but now it felt like an eternity.

James had me on the floor, my abs and arm muscles were screaming from the strain. Again and again, I had to perform tasks destined to leave my body aching for days. Leg and butt muscles were punished much more severely than Master had ever done so, even with the hairbrush or whip.

My thoughts strayed to my beautiful Master…my rock. It was with appreciation that I realized Master would challenge me, but always provided a soft place to land afterwards. It wasn’t to be the same with James. He was taking way too much pleasure in my discomfort.

Still, at the end of our session, I booked regular sessions with James. After all, if a sadistic personal-trainer-from-hell can’t get me in tip-top shape for the trip to Cancun with Master, than nobody else can!

Outside my window…will need to find sunshine in other parts of my day apparently, as the weather is foggy and gray.

My thoughts…i’m looking forward to meditating today. The feeling of being unsettled is usually caused by not grounding myself properly.

Today’s quote…”Before beginning a Hunt, it is wise to ask someone what you are looking for before you begin looking for it.”   – Winnie the Pooh  

I am thankful for…beautiful opportunities which are opening up on many levels. Master’s consideration of keeping us solid as a couple.

This week…i’m focusing on organization and cleaning. Events of the past week have dictated other priorities. Time to get back to it.

I’m wearing…nothing at this time per Master’s orders.

I’m listening to…Master’s original compositions. i so love it when he plays the piano. It’s a gift to be in the midst of that creative energy.

The alarm clock starts to beep at 6 AM, signalling the start to a normal Tuesday morning.  desiree asks permission to get up and feed the cats.  This request is granted, but before she leaves the warm bed, she takes my flaccid cock in her mouth, and gently brings it to an erection, alternately deep throating the entire shaft and licking the sides like her favorite flavored lollipop.  This is a well rehearsed requirement that is automatically performed anytime desiree is permitted to leave the bed. 

Once erect, she gives me a kiss and stumbles out of bed.  She disappears into the kitchen, while I remain in bed, attempting to squeeze a last few moments of rest before starting  my day.  Once the cats are taken care of, desiree slips into the master bathroom to start the shower.  This accomplished, she returns to the bedroom,  naked, and turns down the sheet and blanket.  Extending her beautiful hand, I grab it so that she can help  tug my 230 lb body out of bed.  Hand in hand, we walk to the bathroom.

Standing in front of the shower, I watch her step inside to adjust the water to my preferred warm, but not hot, temperature.  Satisfied, she invites me in to join her.  It is now her duty to act as my personal attendant, performing all tasks necessary, and some not so necessary, to make my morning as enjoyable as possible.

First, she washes my hair.  Usually I will enjoy this step  with my eyes closed, savoring the feeling of her slender fingers massaging my scalp while she applies the shampoo, warm water all the while pounding on my back.  I turn around, facing the shower nozzle, and rinse.

Next, she washes my entire body with a washcloth and the soap of her choice.  She makes special note to wash my cock and balls and anal region with great care.  After rinsing, I will now, usually, have her kneel in front of me.  Though she is not fond of her next task, this is one in which I enjoy.  Once properly positioned, I proceed to urinate on her beautiful tits, stomach, sometimes up to her neck, and maybe her arms, legs, or her hands.  This is part of her humiliation training, and she has now become accustomed to this ritual.  At first, she admitted to me that this made her feel objectified, but after numerous discussions, she is now accepting of this treatment, knowing that she is participating in an activity that I enjoy.  It was important for me to explain to her that I, in no way, do this to lower her self esteem or to make her feel less than human, but in fact, the reason for this activity is the simple truth that I like water sports, nothing more, nothing less. 

Once I have completely relieved myself, I help her to her feet so that she can rinse off.  Once clean, she turns off the water, and completely dries me from head to toe.

Now it’s time for desiree to do my hair, apply deoderant, shave my face and neck, dispense my medications, and apply moisturizer to my face.  While I personally place my contacts, floss, and brush my teeth, I will have her either kneel in front or behind me, and either suck on my cock or lick my anal region.  This is the reason that she places so much attention on cleaning these areas while in the shower.  For me, what a better way to enjoy such mundane tasks than to have my slave pleasuring me while engaged in these activities.

Bathroom duties completed, now we head back into the bedroom.  After turning on the TV to CNN, she proceeds to dress me.  She has predetermined what I will wear, and has precisely pressed my shirt and pants.  She wants her Master to look his best at work, so she knows  the importance of this step. 

Satisfied, I send her off to the kitchen to prepare my breakfast, which usually consists of breakfast cereal.  She will eat with me as well.  It is at this time that we will usually discuss the business of the day, and I will present my list of services that I will have her perform before I return home from work.  These are usually a mixture of household duties, items to address for either her or my business, and researching various sexual topics on the Internet.  I leave it up to her to decide when to work out at the gym, but she knows that I require her to remain in great shape, so she attempts to make this trip as often as possible.

Finally, as time permits, I may engage in some sensation training for her.  This may involve clothespin placement, slapping and /or whipping her pussy, caning of the buttocks, or anything else that I desire.  To her credit, she is adjusting to this training well, and never hesitates to carry out the tasks demanded of her.  I am careful not to extend her limits too far, since she is not (yet, at least) a pain slut.  Before I leave, I will have her place clothes pins on her tits and pussy, and stand in the window facing the driveway so that I may see her beautiful body and face as I drive off to work.

Thus starts another day at our household.

A recurring topic between Myself and desiree is how to structure our finances.  Even though we’re not currently married, we are living together and are totally committed to each other and to making our Dom/sub relationship work.  But how should the finances be handled?  I am a high-earning professional who makes enough money to pay our living expenses, with enough left over to make  mortgage payments on a house that I cannot sell to save my soul. I also make alimony payments to an ex.  So money is really not the problem. 

Desiree, on the other hand, is a freelance copywriter who is working on many projects, but none of which, at this time, are producing much of an income.  So she is somewhat reliant on me to help her  make ends meet. 

There are many financial and practical questions that come to mind as I further enslave desiree.  One of the largest is, as a slave…should she be able to have access to any money? 

I feel that the answer should be “no”, and she is in agreement.  A slave should be totally reliant on her Master to support her, so the financial details are what we are working on today.  We’re transferring all of her automatic withdrawals to my checking account and I am paying all other bills for her as well.  She does not currently have a credit or debit card, so I don’t have to cancel any of those accounts. 

She does have a business and personal checking account which we will close, so that all money will be deposited into my personal checking account.  She will not have access to this money.  There’s a relatively small amount of money in a 401k, which we have decided will require a double signature to withdraw any of those funds. 

She was worried about having emergency funds available should the need arise.  To solve this problem, I’ll apply for another credit card which will have a small credit limit. This will allow her access for any unforeseen situations.  But I will receive the monthly statement to make sure that no transactions take place. 

To complete the financial picture, desiree does have approximately $15,000 in debt from a previous marriage.  I’ll also pay these, but to help reduce her debt she’s agreed to sell me all of her assets. That money will be used to pay down the debt. 

I’m also a firm believer that a slave should own no possessions, so her selling everything to me will help to complete her enslavement.  We’re still working out the arrangements for the asset purchase, but there will be a bill of sale so that there will be no legal issues with the ownership.

Obviously, this is a great leap of faith for desiree.  To totally have nothing is indeed scary.  But for her to feel completely enslaved, this must be accomplished.  On my side, I realize that I’m taking on a major responsibility, one which I do not take lightly.  She trusts me to take care of her, and to not “screw her” in the end.  The reward, for my efforts, is owning desiree.

So now I have a slave.  What is it that I really want from desiree?  This is not as easy to figure out as I thought it would be.  First of all, I have to keep in mind that there are two people involved in this arrangement, not just me.  Of course I have fantasies, many of them dark and Sadistic.  I also love humiliation play.  As I mentioned earlier, I myself was for a short time a toilet slave, so am well versed in scat and urine play.  This does not mean that everybody enjoys this type of play.  And desiree has made it clear that she has no interest in playing with my waste.  However….I would not let her have any hard limits if she was willing to be my slave. 

Why should she have the choice whether to allow me the pleasure of using her anyway I see fit?  So she agreed to not have any limits whatsoever.  This, however, will be a topic for a future blog post.   As easy as it would be to demonstrate my total control over her, and live every fantasy, make her consume all of my waste, and perform all domestic duties around the house, I have to remember that she has willingly agreed to be my submissive, because she loves me greatly.  I, in turn, love her just as much. 

Consequently, I do want to make every effort to control her, yet make it as pleasurable for her as I can, so that she will feel that her submission to me was not a mistake.  I guess it is possible to be a Master with a conscience, and to keep my best friend and lover (who also happens to be my slave for life) happy as well.

Keeping all of this in mind, what have I decided that I want her to do for me?  First of all, I want her to be an excellent domestic servant.  We have already developed a morning routine that she follows to help me get ready for work in the morning.  She has to keep the house in immaculate condition, keep herself in great shape, cook an excellent meal in the evening, and help me at work in any manner that I require.  The list will continue to grow as we settle in to this lifestyle more.  But for now, this list of activities keeps her busy. 

Secondly, she must be naked at all times, except when her 18 year old daughter is present.  She has no problem with this, and I love her body.  The recent piercings that she endured set off a lovely set of breasts, and the clit hood ring dangles so beautifully below her labia. 

She will, at my command, remove her clothing in the car, and also in my office when nobody else is present.  Nudity is one of major tenets of her submission to me, and I will be unyielding in this demand. 

Beyond the requirements of her domestic servitude and her nudity, I have not yet decided how much of the other aspects of slavery that I will demand.  I know that I will continue her sensation training, even though she does not enjoy pain.  One may ask why I would do this.  The answer is pretty simple….I enjoy inflicting pain.  This is where I need to maintain control of myself, however.  I will continue to explore, and push desiree’s rather limited boundaries, and live out some of my fantasies as well.   It would just be easier if she was into pain, but oh well.  We have talked about this very topic at length, and she has agreed to let me do whatever I want, so…………

The activity that scares desiree the most is my love of humiliation.  I know that I will make her drink my urine, and she knows this also, but, for the time being, we have taken consuming scat off of the table.  She agreed to be my slave FOREVER if I would not make her eat shit (and if I agreed to not make her have a nude wedding).  With this lifetime agreement on the line, I thought I could give up scat as a requirement.  I do secretly hope that she will give me the opportunity to do this though as a gift to her Master.  Whether I would actually do this to her or not is still a question, but just knowing I could do it if I wanted would be a great gesture on her part.

So there you have it, this is what I want from my slave.  I will keep working on her sensation and humiliation training, just because I love it, but I will also keep her thoughts and emotions in mind as I do this.  My goal for her though is to make her my ultimate slave, one who can perform any task that I require, with grace and beauty.