submission – who holds the power?

i just finished reading a blog post by someone who “felt sorry” for people who labeled themselves as submissive. Her POV was that submission shouldn’t be one-sided and woe be to the misguided souls who portrayed themselves in this manner. Even though her reasoning seemed to be a bit skewed, i agree with the point that it shouldn’t be one-sided.  And i truly don’t believe that’s the case in a healthy D/s relationship.

She obviously wasn’t seeing the entire picture.

Master S, being the intellectually-balanced being that He is, would probably agree that we give equally. We learn from each other, and grow from those experiences. We submit our own egos in deference to what will best make this relationship work.

Master submits to fairness at times when He realizes that stubbornness or demands for the sake of force  won’t provide the expected results.  Yes there are times when i know He remains silent so as to collect His thoughts rather than reacting. Those are the times when i’ve perhaps pouted a bit or expressed my distaste for a task.  He values the fact that my submissiveness is a gift. One that wouldn’t have been given if He hadn’t earned my ultimate trust and respect.

There are times when it creates a burden for Him. If you’ve never considered Dom burnout, think of this…

Doms constantly need their hands on the reins to drive the relationship. At some point, they need to rest and reintegrate themselves – all parts of themselves, not just the Dom side. It’d be exhausting, especially if you’re determined to do the D/s job well.

I recognize that and express great appreciation for this ongoing commitment.

The easy part for an observer to understand is that i have submitted by giving myself over fully to Master S.  What should also come to mind is that He gives fully of Himself to me as well. This is a true depiction of the “fair exchange” principle.

If you have a good Dom, you know they give of their time to train their subs. They have to watch like a hawk to see if their slaves misbehave and adjust that behavior accordingly. They have to determine when they’ve pushed their sub far enough, or perhaps too far and then do the damage control when that happens.  Decisions to be made, activities to keep the subs’ minds occupied as well as maintaining a delicate balance of relationship and the demands of a D/s lifestyle. The list goes on.

i would never think that Master S’s role is easier than mine. His job is non-stop and He also tends to the core of our relationship, much as a gardener would tend their favorite flowers (sometimes giving them a dose of “tough love” – ha ha)

There’s an old saying “Power corrupts; absolute power corrupts absolutely.” Though I’ve given Master S full control, He’s balanced in His authoritative role.  He’s constantly submitting His ego for the greater good of our relationship. There’s much to be applauded about a mature and sensitive Dom. For that, i’m ever grateful.